This month marks six years since my mum passed away and six years since rheumatoid showed it's ugly head.
In 11 short days it will be six whole years since my beautiful strong mum lost her fight to cancer and how she fort a long battle with a smile on her face. You see I didn't realise just how long she'd battled u til she'd passed. All the time I was out living my life totally oblivious to my mums battle. Which makes me kind of sad because if I'd have known maybe I'd spent more time with her doing things my mum like going out drinking or watching ghost!
You see near the end she was in pain she couldn't eat she couldn't talk, she could write though she wrote a lot of notepads. But you know she kept smiling.
She left me a memory box, it had a letter and a notepad in it and it said so,e real nice things she called me "her tricky vicky!"
After my mum died I got rheumatoid and life got so much harder it was like being hit by two massive bricks in the face!
But six years on I've fought rheumatoid, I've fought an eating disorder and I'm in recovery now and I've suffered depression but I havnt stopped smiling and being there for my family and my friends. Some days I want to turn my phone off lock my door and say no more but that's not what my mum taught me she taught me to fight what ever you face with a smile on your face and know that your family and friends will be there for you because your there for them .. That's what mum taught me.
This week I'm starting my chemotherapy medication again i face it alone with a smile on my face and the knowledge I'm on my own. Come August 20th I'll be on my own come the weekend before I'll be on my own just sat here thinking and crying no doubt but that is life u have to keep going and make the best of it.